a lil update. :)

assalamualaikum.

it's been awhile rite? hehe. susah kot nak dapat internet connection kat uia. modem depan bilik tu lampu tiap-tiap malam dok nyala, line tetap tarak. kitorang sumpah rasa nak bom je benda alah tu tau! x(

erm, so bila dah lama tak menulis, memang awkward gila rasa. ayat pun macam kalah je dengan budak darjah 3. idea banyak, mencurah-curah ke ladang gandum, tapi ayatnya? HAMPEH! huuu.tapi malam ni biarlah rasanya nak cerita jugak sikit.

I had a small talk with my mum tadi. She's been asking about my campus life, friends, study, and almost everything. Tak tahulahh macamana nak sorokkan lagi sebab masa tu I was really stressed out dengan few people. I mean sebelum ni kalau ibu tanya, boleh lagi nak menyorok, cover-cover cerita sedih pasal benda lain, padahal cerita sebenarnya lain. I kept on thinking that I shouldn't bother her with my problems. Tapi tadi tak. She's shocked to know all that.

Terus-terang i told her tentang kenapa I don't like few of my friends, and how I depressed for being 'stuck' with them for quite a time. Ibu tanya why I keep it as a secret while you know you can't hold it? Jawapannya senang, sebab I need myself to think positive about them. Sabar sabar. Kalau tak fikir positive, I'm afraid I'll feed my heart with hatred. I am a person yang kalau dah annoyed and benci seseorang, hard for me to accept them as my friend anymore. Sorry, my bad.

So she asked me to be frank to them. Tell them how i really feel. Urgh, that one is #firstWorldproblem. no wayyy! Paling tak reti nak buatlahh part tu kann. jadi tak ada cara lain selain bersabar. mesti ada sebab kenapa everything turns out this way right? :)

Hurm, bercakap pasal sebab musabab, everything macam dah make sense to me now. Semua sakit yang dulu perit, terasa macam setiap satu dah berubah menjadi ubat yang manis. Tapi yet tengah figure out satu-persatu. We don't need to rush this, let's just take it slow.

Assalamualaikum. :D